Oh heavenly dollar tree...

Dear Dollar Tree,
I am writing you this letter to let you know how much I enjoy your store. I love wandering down your dirty aisles of endless crap for my office, home, and car supplies. Every time I walk in those doors and smell the sweet smell of off-off-brand detergent I grab a cart and start loading up with treasure. Sometimes I have to pinch myself, it's so exciting- because I never know what I'm going to find. So far your products have served as party favors and office decorations, kitchen appliances, and "office supplies" which is really fun size snickers bars and junior mints. I dance to that rockin' 70's funk music when I reach the greeting card aisle and I love that you always have about 100 Bibles in stock at all times. Your products have brought so much joy to my life and I think I just might be your number one fan. Although, I think my expectations of finding a killer deal is getting a little out of hand because every time I buy something--anything, food, rent, clothing, gas, I check the price and think,Why can't everything be a dollar?
Sincerely,
Your number one fan,
Kristy